Things won't be the same in the chatbox on here

Some people might not always have agreed with you, but deep inside everybody respected you Milky, whatever they said out loud.
You were smart, you were funny. One of a kind.
You did make an impact on us.

-Matt S (Grief/BloodDrift)

mystery wrote:

tallerthanatree must live in gay bsdm world or something

Awesome.

Tallerthanatree wrote:

mystery wrote:

tallerthanatree must live in gay bsdm world or something

Awesome.

Hahahahaha!
Classic Cazzman right there lol.
Just a one liner to make everyone bust a gut lol.

I had a dream about Mystery last night. It was very surreal.

I'll miss the guy, even though most of our conversations were in the context of "recovery".

I also had a dream where I was walking down an empty road, and behind me was Cassidy about 15 steps. As I looked at him for a few seconds a car came out from no where and hit him so hard I watched him fly over my head. He landed in front of me and all I did was stare at him. I didn't move or anything. It was really weird. ._.

ummm. could've softened the verbiage there.

olias wrote:

ummm. could've softened the verbiage there.

No use sugar coating our feelings in the midst of what we're all going through. I'm sure that lately a lot of us have felt things that come off harsh when you verbalize them. A lot of us can relate and there's no reason to hesitate in getting what we feel out in the open.

it's pretty interesting how much this forum cares about people they havent physically met.

LastFirstborn wrote:

olias wrote:

ummm. could've softened the verbiage there.

No use sugar coating our feelings in the midst of what we're all going through. I'm sure that lately a lot of us have felt things that come off harsh when you verbalize them. A lot of us can relate and there's no reason to hesitate in getting what we feel out in the open.

gotcha

i had a dream too. really weird. and i agree to not sugarcoat stuff. the following
is what i also posted on firestream.


...From the book "Helping People Through Grief" by Delores Keunning

The impact of sudden death is devastating, for it happens without warning or a chance to anticipate what lies ahead. It allows no time for goodbyes, no time to make amends or ask forgiveness for harsh words spoken in trivial quarrels, and no time to express the love one feels but doesn't verbalize. The unfinished business of the day an never be transacted - it remains unresolved. It is like an unfinished song, the melody stopped in mid-phrase that longs for completion.

There is nothing to compare with the impact and profound shock of sudden unexpected death. The assault is a jolt to the system. After a sudden death the period of shock and disbelief is long lasting. Those who have suffered the sudden death of a loved one will experience a long period of numbness and denial.

Sudden death usually leaves the survivor with a sense of unreality that may last a long time.

Sudden death fosters a stronger-than-normal sense of guilt
expressed in "if only..." statements.

In sudden death, the need to blame someone for what
happened is extremely strong.

Sudden death often involved medical and legal authorities.

Sudden death often elicits a sense of helplessness on the part
of the survivor.

Sudden death leaves the survivor with many regrets and a sense
of unfinished business.

In the event of sudden death, there is the need to understand why
it happened. Along wit this is the need to ascribe not only the cause
but the blame. Sometimes god is the only available target and it is
not uncommon to hear someone say, "I hate God."

Advice to offer survivors:

--Allow yourself to grieve.

--Though you feel God has deserted you, the bible assures us
God has promised the Holy Spirit as your Comforter.

--Your body's grief reaction is normal.

--Follow what feels right for you.

--Tell friends and relatives how you want to be treated.

--Share your troublesome thoughts and feelings with an
understanding, nurturing friend.

--Join a support group or grief recovery program.

--Keep busy, but not to the point you stop the grieving
process.

--Give meaning to your life through helping others.

--Keep active in a church where christian friends will
continue to show support.

--Recognize there will ALWAYS be a void.

--Recognize that suffering engenders growth.

as a grief expert, i might add that grief has no real timetable, but it is said that after the loss of a child, it takes on the average, FIVE years for the parents to recover. recovery would mean incorporating the loss into their lives and feeling like they can live again. in no way do they EVER forget or stop loving their child. this five years is with help. without any kind of counseling, or wanting to get better, the death can make them angry/bitter and haunt them all of their lives. that doesn't have to be, there are excellent books and grief groups to help the bereaved.

plus, with a loving God, there is always HOPE. God works miracles, He can turn tragedies around. He did that for me.

wizardovmetal wrote:

it's pretty interesting how much this forum cares about people they havent physically met.

thing is, we connect with our minds. maybe even MORESO on a forum than in
real life because our conversations are all we have. it doesn't matter if people haven't met.
we've shared stories, ups, downs, all of our emotions. it's quite real.

Cassidy, you were such a cool guy. You were a great friend and you will be missed greatly. You always made us laugh and you were awesome to talk to. We will not forget you.

wizardovmetal wrote:

it's pretty interesting how much this forum cares about people they havent physically met.

I honestly wouldn't have expected to be impacted by the loss of an 'online friend.' I'm not one of the masses who feels bad when some kind of celebrity I truly don't know dies or something. There's only one other person besides Cassidy whose death has impacted me and they were a family friend I grew up with. Online interaction is still person-to-person interaction, so I guess it shouldn't be too surprising. I think a lot of it has to do with also knowing that Cassidy, best known as Milkaaay to me, was an absolutely exceptional individual.

Cassidy was very intelligent, understood deep abstract thought and expression, seemed to absorb information from a variety of sources like crazy, and then he could take all of that and use it to be ridiculously funny in random ways. He was like E.E. Cummings with his Harvard Master's in English throwing out all the rules and writing however he wanted. Haha, I'm really not sure if Cassidy would appreciate the comparison or not. He could be very curt about what he did or didn't like/agree with and even managed to be amusing then--as someone would go in-depth about something and his immediate response would be... "no." Haha! Makes me laugh thinking about it. On some level I think he would manage to appreciate the comparison, though.

I was a big fan of his blogs! Maybe the biggest fan of the ones he wrote on FS. I would read and re-read the ones on the old FS forum and laugh till it hurt my stomach! I used to be able to quote parts of them, ha. I have all of them from FS backed up on a CD somewhere. I knew they wouldn't be floating around the internet forever, so I saved them I'll have to dig those up and share them at some point.

It's a bummer that I didn't chat with him very often after the demise of the original FS site. To be honest, even though he was young, I was intimidated by his intelligence and his amazing sense of humor. I felt like I was not worthy one-on-one instant message conversation for the great Cassidy, ha. He wasn't a jerk or condescending. It's just that I revered him so much. I know that sounds odd of me, but alas that's how it was. I'd still hit him up every now and then whenever I had watched another David Lynch movie or something. It was cool to know someone like him who understood and loved abstract film, most certainly better than I. Still, even though I missed out on the later days of Cassidy, I'm appreciative of all the interactions I did have. I definitely emulated him quite a bit. There were a number of phrases and words that I worked into conversations with my 'real world' friends I hang out with, ha. I'm going to say it wasn't just me, and that Cassidy's influence is widespread.

I used to tell him he was 'sage' a lot, ha, and he was. So, it really sucks that the world has lost the Sage Cassidy 'Milky' Ringwald while he was still so young. Knowing what we lost is what makes it tough, but I find comfort in that he had already managed to make such an impact on me and on so many other people through his humor and through his depth.

pinkRenne wrote:

I also had a dream where I was walking down an empty road, and behind me was Cassidy about 15 steps. As I looked at him for a few seconds a car came out from no where and hit him so hard I watched him fly over my head. He landed in front of me and all I did was stare at him. I didn't move or anything. It was really weird. ._.

*hugs Pinkehh*
Can you send me the poem in your sig please?
I'd really like to put it in mine too if that's alright.

Bright, sneaky, intelligent...loved to push people's buttons online...As an authority figure on FS, I often found his chatroom antics challenging, but the boy was quite funny, and he was really adept at "holding court" in his online domain. He was sort of a force to be reckoned with.

Tassierock said it well...the chatbox won't be the same without him.

Peace,

Jeff

He will be missed. I saw the announcement on Facebook and hoped it wasn't the same person.

Didn't know him. Still, a brother in metal and Jesus has passed. Rest in Peace Brother.

no one deserves this... ever.... his playful banter will be missed... yes he was immensely cheeky but he added color and dimension to any convo or thread he participated in...


bless ya brother and may your family look upon your time here on earth with joy.

Thank you Trevor and matt for telling me this....I cried really ******* hard this morning.

cazz lived in the same city as me...I wish I took the time to know him better.

truly awful news
i hope his family makes it through alright.

That's kinda shocking.. I was kinda close to this kid a year or so ago. I sincerly hope he didn't deny Christ, because back then he made it clear that he was no Christian and that it made not much sense to him. I truly hope he's changed meanwhile...

It's funny, I was thinking about him moments before I got the news. I was thinking about how we used to PM and such all the time and that I should give him my number so we could talk sometime and catch up a wee bit...strange. He was such a funny, funky, witty dude. He'd go off, being stubborn and childish then floor everybody with something intelligent. I miss him. The chat definitely will not be the same. Rest in Peace, Milky.