so, Tommorrow Laura will be landing in San Diego.. she was my last serious "lover"...but do to her going crazy for many reasons and other problems she joined the army and I have not therefore seen her for ..I'm guessing a Year and a Half.

Now I am very excited.. well.. not so much an excitement as something else.. I;m not sure what it is.

HAve any of you had lovers in the military who had gone away for years and then finally returned for a short visit?

IT is an intense thing.. when you really love someone... very intense when they are nearbye again after so long and you want to get the most out of your time with them...etc.

Anyways.. should be interesting.

I haven't seen my last serious "lover" for.... probably two years.

There's some pain there, but its something I had to do. I absolutely could not get/stay sober around her. She wasn't my drinking problem, but a HUGE enabler. She would have chewed my food for me if I would have let her - for someone as sick as I am, I took full advantage of this...

She would get me more booze even when I had WAY too much and was really sick.... just because it was what I wanted.
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I've been dreaming about her too. Recently even. I couldn't imagine getting back with someone after that period of time.

I guess it was tough because there was really no closure. I went into treatment and severed communication with her. No goodbye, no nothing - I just didn't return calls. I really don't know what's happened with her or anything...

It makes me sad if I think about it too much, but calling her (if she even has the same number) would be a huge mistake. She'd convince me to get back with her, and I don't want to run the risk of being drunk again....

I've done the long-distance relationship thing, which brings an intensity when you're together, so I know what you're talking about. Unfortunately that intensity clouded my perspective and made it seem more than it was. Go gently -hope it all goes OK for you, Ash.

I hung out with Laura for a night out on the town tonight.. and she really has changed for the better. It is amazing. It was intense though.. cause you would think those feelings you once had would not be as strong after almost 2 years apart.. but they are just as strong.. and in some ways stronger. And this is all at the same time I'm having alot of problems that I won't get into.

But she seems a bit lost and well.. just tired, from working like a dog in her military and medical training.. which is understandable.

Intense romantic and passionate love... i forgot what it feels like.. and thought I was a little more immune to it than I seem to be.

Such is life.. live and love... for tomorrow we die.

I don't know why I am using this internet forum to bare my soul.. but It reminds of the VnVnation song- Standing...

I bear my heart for all to see.
With my face turned to the sun there ever standing still.

It wasn't you it wasn't me it wasn't anything.
It was a day so long awaited and a chance to be as me.
I let the wind run through my hands
before I turned to walk away.
In distant days I long to sense it all so clear.

And fighting time so hard I pray
that this moment lasts forever.
And will the world stay standing still at least for me.
Through my eyes stare into me.
I bear my heart for all to see.
With my face turned to the sun there ever standing still.

Sutekh wrote:

I've done the long-distance relationship thing, which brings an intensity when you're together, so I know what you're talking about. Unfortunately that intensity clouded my perspective and made it seem more than it was. Go gently -hope it all goes OK for you, Ash.

Well, we were together for like 2 and a half years before she left to the army and lived together for part of it.. went through alot of "hell" together.. so it is a little different than just a long distant relationship... we have a history and know each other well.. the bad and the good.